We’ve all been there – juggling multiple tasks, aiming for perfection, and feeling the weight of being relied upon. When things don’t go as planned, it’s easy to fall into the trap of self-criticism. But here’s the thing: we need to be kinder to ourselves. 

Let’s talk about how to not beat yourself up and pick yourself up when things go awry.

First and foremost, recognize the hard work you’re putting in. Being high-functioning means you’re constantly pushing boundaries and striving for excellence. Celebrate the small wins and remember that your dedication is already a huge achievement.

Even the best of us make mistakes. It’s part of being human. Instead of dwelling on what went wrong, see it as an opportunity to learn and grow. Every mistake is a chance to improve and become even better at what you do.

When you catch yourself spiraling into negative self-talk, stop and reframe your thoughts. Instead of saying, “I messed up,” try thinking, “I’m learning and growing.” Positive self-talk can make a world of difference in how you perceive challenges.

Sometimes, all you need is a breather. Step away from your work, take a walk, meditate, or do something you enjoy. Giving yourself a break can help clear your mind and reduce stress, making it easier to tackle tasks with a fresh perspective.

Don’t hesitate to reach out to friends, family, or colleagues. Sharing your feelings and getting a different perspective can be incredibly comforting. Plus, they might offer valuable advice or simply be there to listen.

There are always going to be things outside of our control. Instead of stressing over them, focus on what you can control – your actions, your attitude, and your effort. By concentrating on these aspects, you’ll feel more empowered and less overwhelmed.

While it’s great to aim high, it’s also important to set realistic expectations. Understand that perfection is an illusion, and striving for it can be exhausting. Aim for excellence, but also allow room for imperfections.

As VAs and freelancers, we often take on more than we can handle because we don’t want to let anyone down. But it’s crucial to recognize your limits. Learn to say no when you need to and prioritize your well-being.

Be as kind to yourself as you would be to a friend. Practice self-compassion by acknowledging your feelings and treating yourself with the same care and understanding you offer to others.

When things don’t go right, it’s easy to get stuck in a rut. But remember, every day is a new opportunity to start fresh. Keep moving forward, stay positive, and trust that you’re capable of achieving great things.

In the end, being relied upon means you’re trusted and valued. Mistakes and setbacks don’t diminish your worth or abilities. Embrace them as part of the journey, and know that you’re doing an amazing job.

So, to all my fellow VAs and freelancers out there – let’s be kinder to ourselves. We’re in this together, and together, we can continue to grow, learn, and succeed.

Keep shining,

Whenever I stop blogging for a while, you know what that means: It's either I've been arrested or that I'm too swamped with work and that my life is actually doing pretty great! Obviously, it's the latter and what can I say? I live in the real world. 

Blogging and writing my heart out has always been my outlet. From the moment I saw Sarah Jessica Parker in SITC tapping away on her Apple laptop when I was in college, I thought that would be my future... 

And even as the show ended... and then came the movies, I still thought that'd be my future. 

And guess what? It really turned out that way! That's me.

Well, I don't work primarily as a writer or blogger anymore (just like Carrie Bradshaw, the character, moved on with her life as a writer and an author), and I have had several laptops and computers die over the years (because, yay, technology!). But really I'm still on my computer or whatever device I need for work, nevertheless, about 8-10 hours a day. 

It's always been like that for the past 18 years now. You know that I started at the call centers, then did home-based transcription, then became a virtual assistant. And again, like I always say, I wouldn't want it any other way!

When AI emerged as a perceived threat to human employees in 2022, I didn't feel the panic that many others did. I saw AI not as a replacement, but as a powerful tool that could enhance my capabilities. Early on, I learned how to wield it effectively and integrate it into my workflow.

With artificial intelligence, I've boosted my skills, streamlined my tasks, and increased my productivity. Instead of fearing it, I used AI to my advantage, making myself an indispensable online worker. With this technology, I've stayed ahead of the curve and delivered even more value.

What took me hours to finish back then, made it super simple and quick that in just 15 minutes, I'm done with my task. How's that for productivity? And what that means is now I'm able to take on more work and be super productive (kaching!) because of AI assistance. 

So, no, that doesn't mean AI does *ALL* the hard work. No one replaces human touch and my style may be imitated but I have the final say. It doesn't replicate my unique approach and skills, and I take pride in that. I stay up-to-date with the latest trends and technologies to ensure my clients get the best results. I stay true to my mission: Providing the highest quality work and delivering excellence.

But I can't emphasize it enough. There's no need to be scared of AI... because using AI has given me more time and freedom, which I think is the best kind of luxury. With ChatGPT, Gemini, Copilot, and all the others helping me out, I can finish my work faster and better. This means I have more free time to do things I love and spend with my family. 

It’s just amazing how these tools can make such a big difference. Now, I get to enjoy my life more while still getting all my work done. As my son keeps reminding me whenever I start getting stressed:

"Hey, mom.... relax. You work to live... you don't live to work." 

So, if you're on the same boat as me, keep in mind that there's plenty of fish in the sea. Let's not limit ourselves but instead, let's continue to strive to create something greater together. Let's be bold and fearless in our efforts. Let's cast wider nets and let's make it happen!

Life’s full of waiting times, right? We all hang on for that next job, a green light on our plans, or just that break we're hoping for. 

I used to think waiting was just wasted time, but not anymore. Now I see it as a chance to grow and think deep.

There was a stretch when it seemed like nothing was happening. Job hunting was my full-time gig, and let me tell you, it was tough. Every day was a mix of hope and that twisty feeling you get when you’re not sure what’s coming next.

That waiting game? It taught me a lot about chilling out and knowing when to step back. Some stuff just can’t be hurried. Life’s got its own pace, and we’ve got to move with it, not against it.

During that slow time, I took a page from nature’s book. Just like winter turns to spring, I knew my waiting would turn into something new, too. It's like waiting is the universe's way of getting us ready for what’s next.

And then one day, boom! The perfect job popped up in my email. It was the right fit, like it had my name on it. All that waiting made sense. It was like life was saying, “See? I got you.”

So, here's the thing about waiting: it's not just sitting around. It's trusting the process, believing in your path, and getting ready for when it’s your turn to shine.

If you're stuck in a waiting spot, hang in there. The good stuff comes to folks who wait, sure. But it really comes to those who know their dreams are worth the wait. It's about the person you're becoming while you’re waiting.

So, let's stick it out during these waiting seasons. They’re our chance to gear up for the awesome times ahead. Believe me, the toughest waits often lead to the best beginnings.

In the tapestry of life, every thread tells a story, and mine weaves through a path less traveled, guided by a dream that refused to be dimmed.

Picture this: the 90s, a time when the world was on the cusp of digital awakening yet still clung to the traditional. It was then I stood at a crossroads, my heart set on storytelling, my mind alive with tales yet to be told. 

Journalism called to me, a siren's song promising adventure and the thrill of the chase. But the harsh reality of low pay and the peril that comes with voicing the truths that others wish to silence cast a shadow over that dream.

So, I chose a different path, one that didn't require a college degree in journalism to validate my passion or my ability to capture the essence of humanity in words. 

The decision wasn't easy. It felt like stepping off a cliff, hoping the wind would carry me. And carry me it did, through self-study, through nights turned to dawn over books and screens, learning not just the art of writing but the craft of weaving emotion and fact into narratives that speak.

I turned my gaze inward, to the boundless realms of imagination, finding stories in the mundane, the extraordinary, in the silent whispers of life. 

My education was the world itself, each experience a lesson, every person I met a chapter in the vast encyclopedia of life. 

The internet became my classroom, a portal to knowledge as vast as the sea, where I could dive deep into any subject that caught my fancy. 

I learned about human psychology, marketing, the subtle art of persuasion, and the bold art of storytelling. And then, almost without realizing it, I found myself in the world of copywriting. A world where words are not just words but keys that unlock desires, dreams, and decisions. 

Who would have thought that this path, once overlooked, would become one of the most sought-after professions? 

That I, writing from the comfort of my home, dressed not in suits but in pajamas, would find safety and fulfillment in a job that didn't exist in the minds of many when my journey began?

The irony isn't lost on me. The very essence of journalism—storytelling—is what I do every day as a copywriter. 

The medium has changed, but the heart of it remains: to tell a story that resonates, that moves people, that makes them see the world in a new light. 

And in this digital age, my words reach farther than I ever imagined, touching lives across the globe from my quiet corner.

This journey of mine, from a dreamer deterred by the daunting realities of the 90s to a digital nomad thriving in the virtual world, is a testament to the power of perseverance, of believing in one's self when the path seems uncertain. 

It's a reminder that sometimes, the road less traveled is the one that leads to the most beautiful destinations.

So, to those standing at their own crossroads, remember this: the essence of who you are and what you wish to achieve cannot be confined to a degree or a traditional career path. 

The world is vast, and the opportunities it holds are endless. 

Keep writing your own story, one word, one day, at a time.

As the world sleeps, my workday springs to life. For almost two decades, I've found my professional haven in the quiet hours of the graveyard shift. My journey into nocturnal work started not out of necessity, but from a preference that soon turned into a passion.

Why Graveyard?

There's a serenity to the night that fuels my creativity, especially in my remote work setup. The stillness enhances my focus, allowing my INTJ brain to delve deeply into projects without the distractions of daytime hustle. It's a period where my thoughts are clearest, and my productivity peaks.

The Health Balance

Managing health while working unconventional hours has been a journey of learning and adaptation. I've discovered that consistency is key. Maintaining regular sleep patterns, even on weekends, keeps my internal clock in sync. Nutrition plays a pivotal role, too, like opting for healthy snacks (nuts, lots of nuts!) instead of caffeine surges has been transformative.

Exercise: The Non-Negotiable

Regular exercise is my non-negotiable especially now in my 40s. It's not just about physical health (hello, maintenance!) but it's a crucial element for mental clarity. A mix of walking, light and brisk, as well as going up and down our stairs keep my energy levels balanced.

The Work Environment

This is it, pancit! A comfortable and inspiring workspace makes a world of difference. Investing in a good office chair and a desk that's got enough space as well as suits my height so I can do some standing while working has been a game-changer, hence, preventing the physical strain that often comes with long hours at a computer. Thoughtful lighting – not too harsh, not too dim – keeps my workspace conducive to productivity, yet cozy. Oh, and always a bottle of peppermint (or my favorite Clarity blend) handy so I can diffuse it when I need to be a little extra creative!

Updated workstation, circa 2024

Tips for Aspiring Night Owls

For those considering the graveyard shift, especially in remote work, here are a few tips: